If cancer had never happened to him, would he have been finishing medicine and heading off to Africa next week with Tim, to do his final student experience before graduating in December? Would he now be counting down the months until he began at his first hospital placement as a new Dr? What a lovely thought.
It seems to me though that once cancer was part of Ben's
life, even if the experience had not been life-ending, it was going to be at
the least, life-changing. Right from the time of his diagnosis in June 2008 his
life changed in ways that he could never have imagined. Entering the
merry-go-round world of doctors' surgeries, pathology labs, scans and x-rays,
not to mention hospital stays, at times he felt a loss of normality and
depersonalisation that left him feeling that people saw him as a 'sick person',
worse—a person with cancer.
His
attempts at remaining 'normal' were admirable, including finishing his science
degree when he was barely able to drag himself to uni with tiredness and
weakness. He also decided to attend his interview for entry into post-grad
medicine at Deakin, making a trip to Geelong when the cancer was already quite
advanced and he was struggling. But it was very soon after that interview that
he said adamantly that he no longer had any interest in studying medicine. Not
surprisingly, he was 'over it'—his words—the whole medical scene. He talked
about finding out about joining the police force.
I love to imagine Ben doing all manner
of amazing things wherever he is now and I wonder if he does some tearing
around in a Malibu boat with friends? Alternatively I can see him revelling in
the skill required to get a yacht flying before the wind with the sails fit to busting.
CSB.
Lindy.
